Random Thoughts - Growing Old Alone, Normal?
Is it weird in our day and age to grow up old and alone? I mean that we have so many different outlets to find a significant other or at least another hopeless person to grow old with. However, what if I wish to grow old? If I were to marry, there is a very low percent that we both would die at the same time so there will be a time where at least one of us is alone. Isn't that more troubling than just growing up alone?
If I were to be married and grow old with someone, then I would have an emotional connection with them. Then having them die and I would have to live anywhere from one day to at most two decades without them. This emotional strain on my psyche would lead me into trying to the fill the void that is left or trying to live my life every single day as though my partner is still alive. I'd be sitting in the living room and without thinking, I would call out their name and then after a couple of seconds of no response, I would walk around the house trying to find them, but come to the realization that she is no longer with me and fall into a state of depression. The emotional strain would probably lead me to self-harm or heavy medication in order to obtain a state of amnesia or heavy sedation.
Now if I were to grow old alone, then there wouldn't be an emotional strain on my psyche. Instead, there would always have been a void in my heart. I wouldn't have anyone to rely on, but I also wouldn't have any offspring to visit me. Instead, I would possibly be visited by those that are wanting to know when and if I'm going to die soon by also trying to gain an emotional attachment to me so that they can be written into my will. Would I let myself be so willingly emotionally attached to another person so that they would be written into my will once I died? Would my death be like that of a terrible drama movie?
So I ask again, is it weird in our day and age to grow up old and alone? I wouldn't think so because I wouldn't want the emotional strain of having a loved one die and leaving me alone in the world.