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Weekend Writings #12

Weekend Writings #12

When I was a ninth, I was trying to juggle girls. If you don't know what it means to juggle girls, I will explain from my point of view as if you were applying to college. There is a college you like but you don't know if they like you back, there is a college you know you can get, and there is a college you know you can't ever get, but if given the chance, you are on thin ice with because they can change their mind quickly. Around the time that I wrote this piece, I was flirting with this one girl that I thought that I could have a real connection with, but my friend who I liked from a while back was starting to flirt with me and since she was older, she could be a lot of fun to hang out with. I decided to forego any chance I had with the original girl I was flirting with and decided to go for my old time friend; however, since she was older than me, she had a lot of other choices of guys to be around, so I could easily be forgotten. For days at a time, I wouldn't recieve any notification from her. One day she would flirt with me constantly, and for the next six days, I wouldn't get a message from her at all. I started to wonder why she would even bother messaging me so I ended up writing this.

Thinking of you,
Wondering if you're thinking of me,
And all the reasons why we shouldn't be.
A physical guy like me,
with a model like you
is about to be a reality.
But I,
I want to be with you forever,
forever in love. 
However, you,
you want to be free.
Free like a bird spreading its wings.
While you run off,
free drinking and smoking,
I will be locked away
like a princess in a castle
waiting for my love.
But I am in love,
only with you.
You ran off though,
living life,
staying young and free.
While I am locked away in a cage,
deep away,
fully in love,
waiting for you to unlock my cage,
I know it will never happen.
Your life doesn't need love.
So I will grow old,
too old,
for when you do unlock my cage,
I would be long gone,
dead with a lonely heart.
I waited and waited, 
but you never came.
I waited for longer,
still you never came.
I waited until I died,
look where that got me.
Dead,
Dead in a cage.
I cannot be revived,
nor came my love for you.
I am not with you anymore.
I have no kids,
no future,
no recorded existence,
in this world.
I lost myself,
waiting for you.
I was fully in love,
but being locked away,
I grew old,
too old.
I was brittle when you unlocked my cage.
Why did we wait for this?
Why did I wait for you?
Why would I waste my time?
You were special,
but you didn't see it from your perspective.
You let me wither away
locked away in a cage.
Movies are an Addiction

Movies are an Addiction

Weekend Writings #11

Weekend Writings #11