What if... an SLA Meeting
I love romantic movies. Whether they are horror romance, romantic comedies or pure romance movies, I just love them. I don't know why other than I guess that I always feel like I need love. Like what if I am a sex and love addict? That would be weird to see. Like, let's imagine it.
I walk into an SLA meeting and there are grown women and men sitting around in a circle going around one by one naming who they are and telling their stories. Then it would come to me.
"Hi, everyone! My name is Kyle, and I have a love and maybe a sex addiction. I'm not too sure yet. I guess it all started back when my mother told me that sex is the greatest thing in the world. I was way too young to know right from wrong, so whatever the big adults said, I would take as the truth. She would tell me that finding the right person is the only thing that I need to do in life and I could only tell who the right person was if the sex was good. As a young child, first, I did not know what sex was, nor did I know if it was going to be good or not, or even how it could be good. She told me to practice by wearing pajama pants and stuffing stuffed animals down my pants to give the feeling as though someone else is in my genital area. I did what she said and stuffed, stuffed animals down there, but it only made me feel really bottom heavy. This went on for about four years and then I finally grew out of having stuffed animals down my pants. Probably because I had a stuffed monkey down my pants in elementary school. You don't know how hard it is to explain this to teachers.
I guess my mother really isn't over having child services come to the house questioning her why she told a young male to stuff stuffed animals down his drawers. My father wasn't much help with the subject either because he has the total man complex. Sex is all he wants and without it, life just sucks. About the time that my father was telling me this, I knew that I had become of age *hint hint wink wink nudge nudge*, and I didn't really think about what he said. I was good enough. Jill was good enough.
During middle school, it finally happened. I guess Jill was expendable and was replaced by the first. Now the first and I didn't really know each other. We practiced a little-known thing as, casual fuck, but we took it a little bit further and didn't really get to know each other. Like on the fourth day that we knew each other, her boobs were out swinging and swaying. As someone who hasn't really seen that before, the physics of the boobies were rather surprising to my young boy eyes.
After the first, never the second, or the third, nor the fourth. Instead came the romance movies. When I would watch them, I felt as though I was a character in the movie. Now, I didn't think I was one of the main characters. For example, I didn't think I was Noah while watching the Notebook, instead, I would rather take on the role of a bystander. Seeing love happen around, and witnessing the high and low and also the lust formed. I feel that it has a stronger, deeper, meaning becoming a bystander and witnessing it than becoming the main character and acting it. There is more imagination and thought by being the bystander and understanding the relationship between the protagonists.
Anyway, I'm now 20, and I splurge on romantic movies all the time instead of going out and finding what love really is on my own. I swim in a sea of fake love between paid actors and that is good enough for me; however, I have come to the conclusion that my expectation of love is too high for anyone to fulfill and thus I will always be disappointed in further relationships.
Anyway, that is me. Continue on!"
I probably wouldn't be the best in an SLA meeting. The others in the group probably wouldn't take me seriously for the above story, but I would be relieved getting it off my chest.
Some of the things stated in the above context are exaggerated and others are not. I will leave this up to the reader to determine what is real and what is fake. If questioned, I will answer.